Kudos to Pastor Rick Warren for the Saddleback Civil Forum on the Presidency last night. I’m watching it a day late thanks to the wonders of DVR. I was impressed with the questions and the format. This is the type of information that folks need to make informed decisions. I was intrigued by Obama’s views on marriage. I’ve been studying and teaching about marriage, adultery, divorce and remarriage in our Sunday School class. I wish I had seen this last night, it would have made for a good talking point in Sunday School. This morning, I posed the same question to our class that Rick Warren posed to the candidates – “Define Marriage”

Obama started off on the right track, I would have liked to have heard him go into a little more detail. He identified marriage as a “union between a man and a woman” and then said, “for me as a Christian, it is also a sacred union – God is in the mix.” Then he went into his support for homosexual civil unions. His definition of marriage is a pretty solid one, with a caveat. I was impressed with his identification of marriage as a “sacred union” and “God is in the mix” but concerned about how he prefaced it with “for me as a Christian.” This smacks of moral relativism. Marriage is either a sacred union ordained by God, or it’s not. Obama then expressed his support for civil unions; which, in my mind, negated any value found in his definition of marriage – but that’s another post for another day. I’m concerned about our definition of marriage.

Our class found our definition of marriage in Jesus’ words in Matthew 19:3-9. In this passage, we found Jesus being confronted by religious leaders asking him about the lawful reasons for a man to divorce his wife. Rather than directly answer their question about divorce, Jesus instead points them toward a correct understanding of marriage. Here’s the passage (bolded emphasis mine):

The Pharisees also came unto him, tempting him, and saying unto him, Is it lawful for a man to put away his wife for every cause? And he answered and said unto them, Have ye not read, that he which made them at the beginning made them male and female, And said, For this cause shall a man leave father and mother, and shall cleave to his wife: and they twain shall be one flesh? Wherefore they are no more twain, but one flesh. What therefore God hath joined together, let not man put asunder. They say unto him, Why did Moses then command to give a writing of divorcement, and to put her away? He saith unto them, Moses because of the hardness of your hearts suffered you to put away your wives: but from the beginning it was not so. And I say unto you, Whosoever shall put away his wife, except it be for fornication, and shall marry another, committeth adultery: and whoso marrieth her which is put away doth commit adultery.
(Mat 19:3-9)

Jesus takes us back to creation, the very beginning, and gives us four significant points to understand about what constitutes a marriage.

1. Marriage is between a man and a woman. The sexes were uniquely created by God as complimentary to one another. This closes the door on same-sex marriage.

2. Marriage is a pledge of commitment. Priorities shift from the family of origin to the newly constituted family.

3. Marriage is a bond greater than any other human relationship. Two become one. Unified – physically, emotionally, spiritually. Marriage is between two people, closing the door on open marriages, polygamy, polyandry, etc.

4. Marriage is a work of God. God Joins, not man. Marriage is a sacred union. The marriage bond is not easily broken.

I find it significant that the Pharisees asked a very man-centered question and Jesus answered with a very God-centered answer. He effectively says, you don’t understand because you think it’s all about you. It’s not. It’s about God. Marriage is a sacred union. Not just for the Christian. Jesus doesn’t qualify any of his statements by saying that they are true for one group of people or in a particular context. There is no relativism in his answer. He speaks as THE AUTHORITY on marriage. He created it. His definition of marriage is universally applicable.

I believe that this is one of the reasons that we have so many problems in our marriages, we don’t have a proper view of marriage. Like the Pharisees, we tend to think that marriage is all about us. It would do us well as individuals and churches to diligently search the Scriptures to be clear on our own understanding of marriage.

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